Well, we’re back at it, aren’t we? Even if you didn’t have kids going back to school, somehow it feels like the beginning of a new year. In my neighborhood, the streets are buzzing again–busy with commuters, school drops, and deliveries. It’s easy to get swept back up into the wave of activity, despite a desire to hold onto that summer ease a little longer. So, to kick off this new season of writing while embracing summer vibes, I thought it would be fun to do a Summer 2024 Kindness Review. And no surprise here – there were uplifting acts of every sort.
Normally, I make time for reading, writing, and thinking about kindness on a regular basis. Afterall, that is the point of my website: to create a habit of kindness in my life and (hopefully) inspire others to do the same along the way.
But in the summer, I take time off from publishing. And I’ve noticed that when I’m not regularly working on a post, it’s easy to get out of the habit of thinking about kindness. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that it all goes out the window, and I become a nasty person. But it ceases to be at the forefront of my mind. I don’t search for or recognize acts of kindness as readily. And I think I miss opportunities to act kindly too. So, I’m glad to be back at it.
James Clear, author of Atomic Habits, wisely said, “Your habits matter because they help you become the type of person you wish to be. They are the channel through which you develop your deepest beliefs about yourself. Quite literally, you become your habits.”
How does one conduct a kindness review? I started by looking back through my summer photos. It was fun: reminiscing on travels and experiences, revisiting time spent with loved ones, and savoring what is possibly one of the last summers I’ll spend with my youngest child.
Then, I looked at those pictures in a more focused manner–through the lens of kindness. When I considered my experiences in this way, acts of kindness began to naturally slot into categories.
It’s obvious that there were different types of acts of kindness. But the exercise of considering experiences by how they could be categorized led me to realize that there was more kindness in my life than I had initially recognized.
Although the reflection on my summer gave me a broad list, here are a few of the most impactful.
There are people who dedicate their lives to others. You know the ones. The people you read about who make extreme sacrifices to help those in need. This summer, I was lucky enough to not only hear this person speak, but to actually meet her.
Maggie Doyne, the CNN Hero of the Year in 2015 and co-founder of the international charity, Blink Now, completely blew my mind. I won’t tell you her story, because I want you to read her book, Between the Mountain and the Sky. But when Maggie, as a 19-year-old girl from New Jersey, left for a gap year, no one could have imagined it would turn into years of selfless dedication to women and children in Nepal.
Maggie’s commitment to kindness changed the trajectory of her life and positively impacted the lives of thousands in Nepal. A story like her inspires hope for humanity.
My family and I have been involved with Operation Smile for many years. It is a global nonprofit that provides life-changing cleft surgeries and comprehensive care for those in need.
Last February, I wrote a post about empathic distress vs. empathic concern and finding ways to give back that work best for you. At the end of the post I wrote, “I also want to take small steps to build my compassion muscle…I don’t want to be limited by my own discomfort.”
So, this summer, I signed up to participate in Operation Smile’s surgical program training and act as a chaperone at their youth leadership conference.
Every day, I was inspired by others’ acts of kindness. I met amazing friends (many of them above) who took time away from work and their loved ones to be trained and chaperone with me. Tireless organizers worked long hours. Operation Smile volunteers, both adults and students, flew in from more than 28 countries. Inspirational speakers, including the founders of Operation Smile, Bill and Kathy Magee, shared their time and expertise. And absolutely everyone had one purpose: keep making a difference for those in need.
My sister, Julie, is getting married in November! And, although I’m old enough to be her mother, she kindly included me as a bridesmaid. I missed out on a lot of festivities around weddings in my younger years, because I was in Russia when my friends were getting married. This summer, I attended my first full-on, no holds barred bachelorette party. I was nothing less than astounded. Janelle, her maid of honor, had gone to great lengths to design the perfect weekend for Julie and her friends and family. We began as a random group of women with merely a bride in common. But, due to Janelle’s countless acts of kindness to craft a weekend of community, we left as friends.
There is nothing more uplifting than when you are pleasantly surprised by an act of kindness, especially when it comes from a stranger.
On my way home from JFK after another long trip, overstuffed luggage in tow, I found myself facing the daunting staircases of the NYC subway with no elevators or escalators available.
As I was weighing my options of how best to cope with my heavy bags, I noticed a stranger, who was walking up the steps, glanced back at me. He stopped and asked, “Would you like some help with those?”
I’ve gotten very good at accepting acts of kindness. (Read this post if you need help with that.) So, I was overjoyed and happily allowed him to do the heavy lifting.
Although the help with the bags was fantastic, the most impressive part of this experience is that he was looking for an opportunity to help. He was paying attention to others to see how he could make a difference.
The acts of kindness that fall into this category were peppered throughout my days. These were the ones that would often go unnoticed, perhaps confused with existing expectations. But nonetheless, they are kindnesses that I shouldn’t take for granted.
This list could just keep going and going…
Kindness can manifest itself in so many ways. And I think it’s easy to miss out on it if you’re not actively looking for it. So, I challenge you to do your own Summer 2024 Kindness Review. When you think of your experiences through this lens, does it help you identify more kindness in your life?
2 Comments
Patty I can think back almost thirty years and remember acts of kindness from you that had big impacts on me. Even now in the day to day, it is often the small kindnesses from people that make a big difference. But my biggest takeaway from your lovely article is JULIE is getting married!!! Congrats to her! She’s still a sweet young kid in my mind. Love to all.
Laura – so wonderful to hear from you! I am so grateful that we found each other when we moved to Moscow. The life transition would have been so much more difficult without you and your kindnesses as well.